So Wrong
by jesswrites
Summary: Carly ponders why November 5th feels so wrong to her. Not ship-specific.


**So Wrong**

**Length: 1,061 words long.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly or anything else mentioned in this story. Just the general ideas.**

**Timeframe: Current spot in series**

**Rated: K+**

**POV: Carly**

**Text meanings: Bold- emphasis, title block  
**_ Italics- Flashback  
_ Underline- Author's Note

"I'm fine." Carly ran up the stairs and into my room. Spencer had just asked her if she was okay.

'_I mean, I'm Carly. Why wouldn't I be fine? I have the two best friends in the world, a great boyfriend (his name's Dave), I'm beautiful, smart, funny, and nice._

_I have a popular webshow. I, myself, am one of the biggest internet celebrities ever, and I'm popular at school too. I was just nominated as Prom Queen last week, and tomorrow's chili day in the school cafeteria.'_

Then why does everything feel so wrong?

Maybe it's because today is the anniversary of her mother's death.

_An eleven-year-old Carly Shay sat in the nurse's office of her school, Ridgeway Junior High. She had been called down to the office during PE, and she was still dressed in her red gym shorts, white t-shirt, and red and white Nikes._

"_Shay… Carlotta Shay?" A young woman came out of the Principal's Office which was adjacent to the nurse's office. "Principal Franklin wants to see you now."_

"_Am I in trouble?" Carly asked. "I didn't do anything bad. It was probably Sam Puckett, you know her."_

"_You're not in trouble, Miss Shay. But Mr. Franklin is waiting for you."_

"_Sorry," Carly commented coyly and walked into the small room with the glass window in the door._

"_Carlotta Shay!" Principal Franklin started._

"_Carly…" Carly corrected._

"_Sorry. __**Carly**__…"_

"_Yes, Principal Franklin?" Carly asked._

"_I just got a call from the hospital, Carly. Your mother has been in a car accident."_

"_What? What happened? Is she okay? Is she __**dead?**__" Little Carly asked._

"_One question at a time, Miss Shay."_

"_What happened?" Carly asked._

"_Well, your mother was on her lunch hour at work. She was driving to meet some friends at Gullini's Pie Shop when someone t-boned her at a stoplight."_

"_Well, is she dead, or is she alive?" Inquisitive young Carly asked._

"_I'm sorry to say this, Carly. But your mother had died of a fatal aneurism. I'm sorry."_

"_Are you serious?" Carly asked. "Is she really…?"_

"_Yes, Carly. I'm so sorry."_

_A slim tear rolled down Carly's cheek as she buried her head in her hands. Principal Franklin walked up next to her and patted her back. "Your brother is coming to get you. Would you like to go get changed?" Principal Franklin asked, pointed to her sweaty gym clothes._

"_Yes, please. I'll be back up in a few minutes. I'm sorry I'm such a mess." Carly ran out the door, down the stairs, down the hall, and into the locker rooms. She ripped off the dirty clothes and shoved them in her little pink bag she used. Quickly, she pulled her clothes back on, and walked calmly up to the bathroom, where she proceeded to throw up and then pass out in a stall._

Oh yes, that was her least favorite part of November 5th.

Then, her dad moved out a year later to join the Navy.

_12-year-old Carly Shay was worried. Her brother and dad were fighting again._

"_No way, Spencer. You've got a future ahead of you." Carly heard Mr. Shay's voice echo into her room, where she was doing homework._

"_Dad, this is my choice. Not yours, not Carly's. Mine. And I've made my decision."_

"_Spencer Shay, you are __**not**__ dropping out of law school. No way. I paid way too much for you to follow your dream," Mr. Shay said. "Why would you quit now?"_

"_Dad, this isn't my dream. It's __**yours. My **__dream is to become an artist. My dream is to be a sculptor. My dream is to be there for my family."_

"_What in the world are you talking about?" Mr. Shay asked, confused._

"_I'm talking about how you gave up on Carly after Mom died. You're a shell now, face it. You wake up, go to work, come home, eat dinner, and go to bed. You're not the one who makes dinner, or asks Carly if she needs help with her homework, or comforts her because her mom's dead," Spencer said._

"_So what if I am a shell? You're a quitter. You're getting yourself into a real mess, Spencer Shay," Mr. Shay replied._

"_I may be a quitter, but at least I'm trying to get over Mom. She's gone, Dad. She's not coming back, no matter how much you ignore the closest thing you have left of her: Carly. She's still here, and when she lost her mom, her dad went with her."_

"_Fine, Spencer. Quit law school, become an artist. I don't care anymore. You're just making up lies. I'm leaving, Spencer, and you'll be lucky if I __**ever**__ come back." With that, Mr. Shay left the apartment and never came back._

_Carly then appeared, her head poked over the stair's hand rail._

_Spencer had his head in his hands, and then looked up. "Did you hear all that, Carly?" he asked._

"_Yeah." Carly came the rest of the way down the stairs and stood awkwardly in front of the couch._

"_C'mere, Carly." Spencer held out his hands as a signal for Carly to hug him. She obliged._

"_Hey, Spencer?" Carly asked, her voice muffled by Spencer's shirt._

"_Yeah?" he responded._

"_I'm scared."_

Things had turned out okay, but Mr. Shay never did come home. He called occasionally to talk to Carly, but never to talk to Spencer.

That brought Carly to so many good things in her life: iCarly, Sam and Freddie, Ridgeway, good grades, beauty, being a famous web comedian… yet things still felt so incredibly wrong.

Maybe it was because a truly broken heart can never really heal, and Mr. and Mrs. Shay left holes and Carly's heart that wouldn't be fixed.

But Carly would still keep trying.

Things that were so right had never felt so wrong.

Author's Note: DONE! Alright, did you like it! Let me know in your **review.**__I hope you did. This was inspired by me wondering what the heck happened to make Carly's dad leave and her mother leave/die. Actually, this is the first nonromantic fic I've done, so let me know what you think. Oh, and if that wasn't clear, Mrs. Shay died when Carly was eleven, and then Mr. Shay and Spencer had a fight on the one year anniversary of this: Both events happened on November 5th, just different years.

Reviews are love,  
jesswrites


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